Hidden Tears
by Aoi Kitsukawa
Summary: He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...
1. Gone

**Hidden****Tears.**

A fan fiction by Aoi Kitsukawa

**Disclaimer:** Gakuen Alice is belongs to Higuichi Tachibana-sensei, I only borrow the characters in the manga. Please enjoy reading it!

**Author****'****s****Note:** I admit it, this idea had been in my mind since this early year (I think when I was in my last second semester in Feb-April), but I never had a chance to make it since I was too busy this semester and waiting for the next chapters of Escaping Arc to finish. Moreover, I was having difficulty to adjust myself within myself after my best friend got kick from campus and now is studying in other university; I felt like half of my self was gone.

For the main character in this story, I won't revealed it until chapter 3 or 4, however the pairing is with Sakurano. Truly, I'm a masochist huh (man, Natsuko-san and Luchia-chan had said the same things to me too!)? Seriously…

Mostly happened after the current act. Who was this 'he'? I think it's pretty obvious, but not Natsume. Because of certain misunderstanding, I had to change the summary as well. Oh dear.

Enjoy the story (can I really say that?)! Please read and review.

**Summary:** He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...

**Tear****1:** Gone.

'_**I'm no longer able to be here, since my existence only causes nothing but pain…'**_

He zipped the last luggage of him.

He looked around the room, which once was occupied by him.

It was empty.

It was silent.

Nothing was placed inside the luxurious room of Special Star student like him.

Everything had been placed inside the boxes that were keeping into a capsule trunk, which was made by one of the Technology Ability Class students.

He was glad that he was able to purchase it before the stocks sold out.

He sighed as he wiped up his sweats. He glanced at the clock in the room.

It was 11.30 PM.

It took him more than three hours to collect everything. He sighed as he trembling to stand up; the tiredness had taken on his body. He held his throat, felt thirsty and painful.

It has been a month since the incident happened. He just discharged from hospital last week, after being confined for almost a month due to his injuries. At that time, he was about to die, but someone had rescued him.

No need to say who the person who saved him from the death was.

After he drank the water from the bottle, he sat on the large bed and stared at the empty space of him. His eyes were empty, he felt lonely and sad…

But nobody was there for him.

For a sinner like him.

He glanced at the wall where his uniform was hold. He just stared from the bed, and doing nothing. He then stood up and walked to the desk, where he looked at the materials on the medium size desk laid on.

His student ID book, badge and a letter.

He stared silently, before he walked away and turned off the light.

He glanced for the last time, before unlock the door, grabbed his luggage, and silently left the dormitory.

Good thing that he had several types of Alice stones that he received from his friends and junior, as well as his sempais so he easily left the building without being detected.

Heh.

Friends, huh?

Did he ever have even a single 'friend'?

Maybe not.

He walked faster but silent enough from waking up the other residents. After such time, he reached the edge of the Eastern Wood, located near the High School Division. He panted a little, before he slowly took out an Alice stone; light purple-pink in colour, and clenched the stone tightly.

He mumbled some chants, and as the full moon light fell on one of the tree where he stood, a sudden keyhole appeared. The hole will last within one minute so he had to jump into it if he wanted to leave the place.

He glanced at the building in front of him, sadness had boil within him. But he knew that if he stayed longer in the academy, nobody would ever care for him anymore.

Like they care if he was gone.

Because he was a sinner, terrible sinner.

People who really involved in the last incident never forgive him.

He was so sure about it.

Being abandon, totally alone, and he could not able to take it any longer.

Perhaps, those people would be happy if he was gone.

Yes.

Really happy.

Took a last glance, he quickly jumped into the whole.

And disappeared within the night…

Without anybody ever realized the loss of his existence in the academy.

** It's my other new story, but the updates are not that frequently. Final exams around the corner plus with tasks and tests that fell upon me, I can't expect to update faster! Lucky for me as my lecturer of International Organization (minor course) postponed the date of submitting the assignment! Still, tasks and tests…**

** LET ME CRY FOR GOOD!**

**Try to figure out who's this poor character. I already give the clues so try figure it out. The second character (the poor one) will be appeared only in two conditions: a)After chapter 3 or 4 and b) If readers already figure it out. **

** I already post the summary in AoGA in FB so there's some differences with the current summary. Please read and review. –Aoi Kitsukawa.**


	2. Where Did He Go?

**Hidden****Tears.**

A fan fiction by Aoi Kitsukawa

**Disclaimer:** Gakuen Alice is belongs to Higuichi Tachibana-sensei, I only borrow the characters in the manga. Please enjoy reading it!

**Author****'****s****Note:** Well, never expected to be this fast to update, but of course I have to pay heavy price for it! I got doom for my Arabic mid-term and quiz twice! And I couldn't answer better in my Political Thought 2 mid-term exam due to unusual heart beat and serious headache! I just hope that time to collapse and was send to the hospital! My health isn't very good lately.

I think maybe I should post chapter 3 and 4 faster so that people would know who this poor guy is. By the **Lily**, thanks for your review!

Who knows that I'm actually an S&M person? TOT

Enjoy the story (can I really say that?)! Please read and review.

**Summary:** He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...

**Tear****2:** Where did he go?

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><p>'<em><strong>People only realize the existence of others after they disappear from their sight…'<strong>_

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><p>A strange feeling came across him that morning.<p>

Sakurano blinked for a while as he stepped into the High School Division building. The assemblies that supposedly are hold that morning was cancel due to heavy rain. It was caused by a Weather Alice user from A Class of Elementary School Division who fell on the ground and cried out loud.

Something was not right that morning.

He could feel it.

But what?

Ever since the last incident had ended with such chaos, he always aware of the sudden change of his surrounding. Somehow, his intuition had gotten sharper than before. He could feel something was wrong but he couldn't identify what had caused him to feel that way.

As he walked away with Subaru, he saw a class for the third year student.

He was walking next to that person's class.

But he couldn't see him.

Was he late?

But that person was never late.

Still, it's bothering him.

Subaru saw his gloomy expression but said nothing of it. He knew his best friend was not comfortable ever since they woke up from sleep, but what the caused of his discomfort was unknown to him.

Although he also felt the same as Sakurano.

Later on after they reached their class, an announcement was heard throughout the division, requesting the representative or the student council's members to be present in the meeting room.

Still felt disturb, both of the teens walked together to the meeting room where the HSP and the other students were there to start the meeting.

But there was no sign of his present.

He looked at Principal Yukihira, who shot a question glance at him.

He just shrugged his shoulders, did not know where he was.

The principal also felt the same as him.

After waiting for some time, felt so restless and uncomfortable, Sakurano request to postpone the meeting. Everyone immediately agreed since most of them were having tests that day. After everyone was gone, the HSP asked him and Subaru to accompany him to the High School Dormitory.

They wanted to search for that person.

But as they reached the building and went to his room, there was nothing replies inside the room.

It was silent.

Felt curious, the principal tried to open the door, only to find out it was unlock.

What they saw after that was a rather shocking one.

Inside the Special Star room, besides the furniture, nothing was left.

It was empty.

The books, the belongings, all of them were gone!

And that person too!

Where did he go?

Why everything is empty?

Subaru went inside and saw the uniform that was hang on the wall. On the desk he also saw the student ID book, the Special Star badge and most of all…

A letter.

Both HSP and Sakurano went to his side, and looked over his shoulders to see what was written on the front letter.

There was some writing on it; obviously that person's handwriting. But it didn't refer to anyone; only one statement that had caused turmoil appeared inside the adults' body.

_**I'm sorry…**_

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><p><strong> Chapter 2 is done. Will be posting the next chapter probably in mean times, not too sure about this. By the way, the identity of 'that' person will be reveal neither in chapter 3 or 4, depends on the review. <strong>

** Please read and review. –Aoi Kitsukawa.**


	3. A Lost Traveler

**Hidden****Tears.**

A fan fiction by Aoi Kitsukawa

**Disclaimer:** Gakuen Alice is belongs to Higuichi Tachibana-sensei, I only borrow the characters in the manga. Please enjoy reading it!

**Author****'****s****Note:** Suddenly after finishing my archery assignment and then returned back from the archery friendly match, I lost my inspiration to finish the third chapter. Finally I got the idea back, but the writing style would be tough to maintain again.

The identity for this person will be reveal after chapter 3, so please be patient for this.

Special thanks to Kitty Cat Lysanne, KidTantei, ButterflyFire09, Lily and Haze for the reviews and story alerts.

**Summary:** He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...

**Tear****3:** A Lost Traveler…

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><p>"<em><strong>We<strong>__** traveled **__**together.**__** And**__** after **__**countless **__**summers,**__** one**__** day, **__**I**__** was **__**all **__**alone**__** again.**_

_**At**__** the**__** end **__**of**__** everything,**__** I **__**was**__** truly**__**… **__**and**__** utterly**__**… **__**alone**__**…"**_

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><p>He walked in stagger as the snow fell on him.<p>

It was the second day of him missing from the academy. As he carried the luggage and backpack on his shoulder, he felt like his legs were getting heavier than before.

His body was injured, and his face had some bruises on it.

Last night, as he finally left the High School Dormitory, he used an Alice stone with can took him out from the academy without being detected. As he was about to jump in, he needed to think where he wanted to go. However he felt; the only thought he got was a blurry image of neighbourhood where he stayed during his childhood.

So he ended up in this area; a strange neighbourhood that he barely known.

The Alice stone that he used was the same one at the music room in the High School Division building had led him to this place.

The Time-slip Alice Stone.

And unfortunately the Alice didn't help him to land on the ground SAFELY.

He was unfortunately fallen in the wrong place at the wrong time. As he get up and steadied him after the fall, he suddenly met with delinquents who claimed that he was entering their territory. Due to that reason, they demanded him to give their money as a 'protection fee'.

Hmp, protection fee huh?

Who the hell are they to command him like that?

Thanks to the Alice stones of Telekinesis, Thunder and Wind, he was able to shoo away those brats.

But with a heavy price, of course.

It was a good thing that he fell in the dark path or otherwise people would saw him using Alice and called a police. He was able to beat them up but they also managed to punch and kick his body.

And it was very painful.

Right now, he did not know where to go. He was all alone, nobody was with him, plus it was mid night so mostly people were already asleep now.

Not to forget the snow had adding the pain more onto his body.

He felt like to cry.

But nobody was there for him.

Because he was a terrible sinner.

No.

He more like a lost traveler, who did know what to do in an isolate place that he barely known; was send there because of his sin.

And he felt terribly pain.

He knew nobody would care if he was a lost traveler.

After all, he was all alone.

It was his decision to leave the academy.

Because he knew, nobody would ever forgive him for the crime he had done.

They would happily forget about him too.

So he left, and became the lost traveler.

Leaving everything behind what had shaped him into the current him.

In the end, he was alone.

He started to feel dizzy; it seemed one of the delinquents' attacks hit him on his head. He felt painful throbbing started to torture him merciless, and he walked unstably, almost hit the ground.

He did not realize that he was in the middle of the road.

He did not hear the loud horn that appeared in front of him.

He only saw a bright light that suddenly appeared in front of him, followed by the sound of hitting break, and it was stop.

He barely knows what happened.

It was because, after that, the only thing he ever remembered was the pain that kept torturing him, and he fell that his body became so heavy that he started to fall down, and his eyelids were too tired to open up again.

He heard something was open and a man shouted to him, followed by running footsteps.

After that, he was completely unconscious!

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><p><strong>Chapter 3 is done, but I feel a bit failure. Just don't ask why. Chapter 4 will be reveal the identity of this, but from this person's point of view. Who will the main POV will be reveal in the next chapter.<strong>

** Thank you to those who are reading and reviewing my story. Please, don't forget to leave a review. –Aoi Kitsukawa-**


	4. What He Had Left Behind

**Hidden****Tears.**

A fan fiction by Aoi Kitsukawa

**Disclaimer:** Gakuen Alice is belongs to Higuichi Tachibana-sensei, I only borrow the characters in the manga. Please enjoy reading it!

**Author****'****s****Note:** I was not feel good lately and it seems that I'll be affected by cough since I had felt my throat isn't very good at all. Cold drinks are good but not to your throat.

Besides, the only ways for me to get inspire are whether I am in sad or gloomy mood (since mostly my stories are in hurt/comfort theme) or if I was at the emergency situation (last minute assignment before the deadline!).

Special thanks to Nori. NTH .SNOW for her favourite and story alert, as well as 12star98na for the review.

**To****12star98na:** No, he didn't kill Mikan. However, it's more on the acts that he had done and yes, he did something horrible. I guess you can see who this person is. Anyway thanks for the review!

**Summary:** He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...

**Tear****4:** What he had left behind…

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><p><em><strong>Far below…<strong>_

_**We've been starting to collect what you've let go...**_

* * *

><p>"From what we had investigated so far, it seems that the security didn't detect any kind of reaction towards the barrier, neither underground or air."<p>

Kazumi narrowed his eyes as he listening to the reports by one of his men in his office. So he didn't crush the barrier huh? He thought.

"Anything else that related to this matter?" He asked as he looked at the people in the office.

"It seems that person had left the academy during night, and he was able to avoid the security surveillance cameras that were placed at the academy walls," Said another person.

Kazumi stayed silent after he heard the reports from his men.

He did not happy with the current founding after all.

Apparently, he had ordered the staffs to start an investigation regarding the missing person since two days ago. At first, most of them were shock to found out that there was one student had gone missing from the academy, but none of them realize or notice at all.

How did he disappear from the academy without a trace?

Knowing that this matter would spread out like a hot gossip of famous celebrity, the High School Principal had taken actions upon the matters.

It was not something that can be joke around.

This is serious!

A student under his care suddenly missing, but that was not the problem.

The problem was that student was someone important because of his involvement in the last uproar that happened during the New Year Concert event!

When he found out about the missing student, he immediately ordered Sakurano and Subaru, who were too shock to say anything because of what they had seen, to inform the Middle School Principal and her representative –Hii-sama and Shiki Masachika; about what had happened. Also, not to forget to inform Jinno and other teachers as well.

Both of them, as well as Jinno, Narumi and Misaki-sensei immediately went to his office and asked him whether it was true or not.

Followed by them after that were Serio, Koizumi Luna and the members of Dangerous Ability Class aside Sakurano and Subaru.

Sadly, it was true at all.

It was a month of February, a month after everything was over. After they defeated the ESP and shoved him off from the school ground, everything finally turned to peace and joy. The injured people were send to the hospital; he and Mikan were among of them, to get treatment. Some of them were confined to the hospital due to the injuries on their body.

That person was among those who were confined to the hospital.

There was another reason why he needed to find that boy.

Not because he was among the person who aside the ESP.

Not because he was a terrible sinner.

No.

It was not like that.

He wanted to know the reason of his actions.

He wanted to know why he did not bother to tell him, or the others the reason why he aside the ESP during the first uproar in the academy.

He knew that boy was not that kind of person who easily switched side unless something had happened between them. Even after the first uproar ended, he realized that boy seemed wanted to talk to him but he hesitated and then walked away in guilty.

From that fact, he knew that boy was bound to something that forced him to do that.

At the moment he saw him in the hospital, all alone, fighting to survive, he realized that boy didn't have anyone to visit him. He was the only one who did, and only then, Sakurano and Subaru followed him.

He was more like a crumble person who will break down in any moment.

That was why he wanted to know his reasons for acting like that, and yet that boy seemed to lose his ability to talk while he was confined at the hospital, thus interrupting the investigation that he tried to conduct at that boy.

Even Shiki, Hii-sama and Jinno expressed the same matter as well.

They need to know. They were the important people who involved in the uproar on attempt to free Mikan from the ESP's hand. They deserved to know.

Narumi was the teacher of that boy's ability class, and Misaki-sensei was his friend and involved with the second uproar, so they needed to know as much as the others.

Sakurano and Subaru were the members of the Student Council so they had the same right as the adults.

And yet, he was gone…

Principal Yukihira rubbed his aching forehead as he told his staff to make sure not to leak the information about the missing student. Temporarily, they told the others that the missing student was sick and again had to be confined into the hospital.

He hoped that it would be calm before the storm.

But how long he and the others could prevent such news from leaking out?

How long?

He also asked Sakurano, Subaru, as well as the Dangerous Ability students and the connected staffs to shut up their mouth if anyone asked them about the student. He also requested their help to participate with the investigation that he had conduct.

They had been tried to collect or search anything that related to that boy.

He sighed as he leaned against the chair; felt his headache had throb his head more than ever. He then glanced at the table where a piece of paper laid on the table.

It was the student's information.

He sighed again as he read the info from the end of the paper until above.

_Blood type: AB_

_Class Ability: Somatic._

_Age: 18_

_Date__of__Birth:__November__…_

That boy shared the same birth month as him, except he was born in the middle of November.

His eyes fell on the name of the student. Finally gave up on the pain, he sat up and stared at the name of the student, before he stood up and left the room, grabbing the piece of information in his hand before he grabbed his briefcase, put the paper and other things into the briefcase and left.

The name of the student somehow had haunted him for a while as he left his lock office.

The name of the missing student was…

_**GOSHIMA HIJIRI!**_

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><p><strong>Finally! I reveal the name of this missing student! Hahahaha!<strong>

**Thank you very much for those who review and put alerts on this story, I really appreciate it. The next chapter will be post in unknown time since I got stuck with deadlines and tests, especially next week! ARGH! Final exams just around the corner!**

**I know not many people like Goshima but I feel that he's not as bad as people believe. He might be the same as Luna and Serio, but his reasons for his acts still unknown. Besides, not many authors like to write side characters' stories, especially such person as Sakurano, Subaru and Goshima. I really like them though.**

**Next chapter will be a little bit interesting with the involvement of my OCs in this story. I hope you people enjoy this SADIST, CRUEL TWISTED STORY OF MINE! WHAHAHAHAHA~!**

**Meet again in the next chapter. Please read and review. Ja ne! –Aoi Kitsukawa-**


	5. Somewhere Strange, but Safe

**Hidden****Tears.**

A fan fiction by Aoi Kitsukawa

**Disclaimer:** Gakuen Alice is belongs to Higuichi Tachibana-sensei, I only borrow the characters in the manga. Please enjoy reading it!

**Author****'****s ****Note: **I'm sorry for the late update; last week I was soo busy with three assignments which had the same deadline, of course I'm half death after that. Losing the strength to write and then having writer's block! Urgh! Can't stand it too much!

Special thanks to KidTantei for the reviews. Your answer is at the end of the story. ;)

**Summary:** He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...

**Tear ****5:** Somewhere strange, but safe

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><p><em><strong>I don't know you, and you're stranger to me, but upon the meeting between us, I know I feel safer with you…<strong>_

* * *

><p>He don't ever remember how did he get into this place.<p>

Goshima Hijiri, an 18-year-old teenager looked at his surrounding with confusion that boiling inside of him.

He was confused.

He was scared.

He did not know how he got himself into this place.

A strange place where he himself did not know anything about it.

The last thing he ever remembered was, when he started to feel dizzy; it seemed one of the delinquents' attacks hit him on his head. He felt painful throbbing started to torture him merciless, and he walked unstably, almost hit the ground.

He did not realize that he was in the middle of the road.

At that night.

That snowy night.

He growled as another pain stabbed his head merciless.

He was sure his head was hit hardly.

But who was the person who help him?

Judging from the condition of him; wrapped in bandaged almost all over his head (he didn't hit himself hardly after he fainted right?), his neck, arms, torso…

A sound of sliding door being opened shocked him from his world and instantly he glanced up to see that was entering the room.

"Ohayoo."

A gentle, male voice greet him in friendly manner, however it did not stop himself from looking at the newcomer with suspicious eyes.

However, he felt strangely calm…

And safe.

He looked at him again, the newcomer.

He was a man in late 30s. His eyes were black, shone like a crystal bathed with the sunrays. His hair also black, with bangs that cut in the middle; the bangs however seemed a bit longer to each sides. He was tall, yes, in 179cms, but still, he looked thin.

He had this gentle expression as well as his aura.

That young boy once again felt safe, and calm…

"How's your body?"

His question startled him. Hesitate, he slowly looked up, stared at the gorgeous black eyes that fascinating every person who looked directly into them.

Haha, good thing he's not having that pheromone Alice or otherwise he will end up crazy!

A sudden touch jerked him, a lot. Suddenly, he seemed to see a vision of strong hand, slapped his face hard, followed by several curse words that was aimed to him, scared him terribly.

He did not hear the voice of the man that spoke to him panicky.

He did not want to feel the touch of other hands that started to make a contact with him.

He did not hear his own scream, or other voices that started to fill his surroundings.

He only realized that he was crying when he felt strong arms held him in tight hug and held him closer to him.

Upon in this embrace, the soft voice kept saying to him gently to calm down and not be afraid; everything is going to be alright.

His breathe slowly calm down, and closed his eyes as he felt a warm hand stroke his hair gently.

Then he remembered what had happened to him.

He ran away from Gakuen Alice because of certain circumstances.

He used Time-Slip Alice to get out from the academy.

However, upon he landed at the outside world, he fell on the wrong place.

And fight with the delinquents.

He managed to run away, but with injuries on his body.

He just wandered without knowing where to go, all alone in the middle of night.

He did not realize that he already walked to the middle of the road.

He did not hear the loud horn that appeared in front of him.

He only saw a bright light that suddenly appeared in front of him, followed by the sound of hitting break, and it was stop.

He barely knows what happened.

It was because, after that, the only thing he ever remembered was the pain that kept torturing him, and he fell that his body became so heavy that he started to fall down, and his eyelids were too tired to open up again.

He heard something was open and a man shouted to him, followed by running footsteps before he lost his consciousness.

That was how he ended in this unknown place.

The man who was holding him kept reassured him that everything will be alright, and nothing to be afraid of.

It was strange; they were strangers but it seems that he felt more safe secure with him.

It was their first meeting in awkward way, but he never felt so safe like this.

When was the last time he ever remember being safe in his life?

Perhaps, only 'that' time…

That he ever feel safe.

As he laid down (the man made him do that), he looked at the man with curious eyes. He wanted to say anything but his throat felt pain; the wound that he received from the last attack was not healing yet.

He just nodded his head when the man asked him to lie down, take some rest and sleep. He unconsciously grabbed his hand as the man wanted to leave the place, and he said to him;

"Please don't leave me alone…"

Like a parent, he stared at him with shock, and then his eyes turned gentle and he nodded his head, agreed to stay with him…

For that moment.

As he was about to fall asleep, he wondered why he felt so safe with the stranger, because this was their very first meeting with each other.

They were strangers, and yet, he knew that he felt safe whenever he was with this person.

Knowing that he finally safe, Goshima let his eyelid closed and let him to be submitting into the world of unconsciousness.

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><p><strong> Finally it's done. I don't know when I'll be able to update this story as well as the others since I'm going to have my final exams start this Saturday (23.11) so I'm sorry for the late update. I hope this story can satisfy the people who were waiting for it. Please read and review. <strong>

** Until we meet again. Thank you for those who read this story, I really appreciate it. Ja ne. –Aoi Kitsukawa.**

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><p><strong>To<strong>** KidTantei:** Yes, the people in the academy know who is the person whose missing that time, however they just didn't realize when he ran away. And yes, I admit the mistake. It's just that I don't know how to make readers realize this fact so… just like you say. Hehehehe….

_'...__the __connected __staffs __to__ shut__ up __their__ mouth__ if __anyone__ asked__ them __about __the __student.'__" Shut__ up__ their__ mouth"_ –Kazumi was saying it to himself; it is more like his own monologue when he recalled the flashback as he asked these people to keep the matters in secret. Yes, it is informal but I LOVE the way the said to himself!

Haha, thanks again for the review my friend.


	6. The Glass Heart

**Hidden Tears.**

A fan fiction by Aoi Kitsukawa

**Disclaimer:** Gakuen Alice is belongs to Higuichi Tachibana-sensei, I only borrow the characters in the manga. Please enjoy reading it!

**Author's Note: **Hello everyone, sorry for the very, very late update. I was quite busy since this semester I had taken a course which requires lots of researching, reading, time and energy. I was so exhausted that weekends I just sleep almost half of the day just to recover myself.

This chapter is a bit sentimental, although it's not the main character who viewed it. I hope everyone can satisfy with this short chapter so please read and review.

**Summary:** He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...

**Tear 6:** The Glass Heart.

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><p><em><strong>"You can close your eyes to things you don't want to see, <strong>_

_**but you can't close your heart to the things you don't want to feel…"**_

_**- Unknown**_

* * *

><p>Nobara opened her eyes as she lifted her hand from the bed.<p>

Right now, she was inside the Special Star room at the High School Dormitory, trying to trace any kind of memories that was left behind from its previous owner. Accompanying her in the room were Persona, Sakurano, Mikan, Subaru, Jinno, Shiki and Principal Yukihira.

Ever since Mikan had told her uncle and everyone about her additional Alice was Igarashi Kaoru's Memory Processing Alice stone, she was asked to join the investigation in order to find out what exactly had make the current student president missing from the school. Nobara, who was willingly to help the people to search for the missing person, agreed without hesitate.

But investigating people's feelings was not as easy as investigating people's crimes.

It was far too difficult.

What she could feel right now was…

Chaotic.

She could trace down many emotions, something that even she herself was not expect to find out from such person. She could feel the feelings such as turmoil, sadness, anger, pain, but most of all were despair and sadness.

This matter was something she never expected to be. How such person as Goshima can affected by these negative emotions? From what she knew so far, that man was always smiling, and despite his gentle and kind smile, he was the ESP's ex-spy.

It was not that she wanted to judge him badly. It just that, such kind of emotions were something that rarely seen in any kind of men (except the Dangerous Ability Class and people who got manipulate by the ESP), as he was suffering from something that only he managed to control. Something hidden deep, deep inside of his heart; something that she believed the owner of this feelings were refused to let anyone knew his secrets.

But how it can be consider as secrets if she could able to trace his chaotic feelings as she did right now?

Diving into his deepest feelings that she almost drown because of them, she believed that this person –Goshima Hijiri had possessed such secrets that only he could manage to deal with. Something that probably people couldn't understand in the first place.

Because of that, she had the urge of wanting to know more than what she knew.

So she lifted up her hand.

But as she did so, her body started to feel weak and her legs wobbled a little.

Persona quickly caught her from hitting the floor.

He could see her was sweating and tired.

It seems that the side effect of using the additional Alice stone had taken a toll on her fragile body.

The Alices that been inserted using Mikan's Alice need a compatibility between the stone and the person who will receive it; still it could cause a harm on the users' bodies as well.

Kazumi realized that Nobara was tired, and postponed the investigation in other time, dismissed everyone at once.

But deep inside of his heart, he knew that Nobara felt something that she shouldn't feel, and he also…

He felt like he was beckoning to discover more about the secrets of the missing person, and he knew his heart couldn't deny the fact that he too, was unable to stop his own heart to attract towards the darkness that the missing boy was carrying on…

* * *

><p>He looked at the young boy who was sleeping on the bed, which previously was his.<p>

Ajuro Tatsuya, an elite superintendent of Tokyo Metropolitan Police HQ sat next to the young boy, who was sleeping on the bed, which once was his. He carefully not to touch the boy's body, as he remembered his younger brother Ajuro Kenji; the one who comforted the boy before told him that he might be having a traumatic experiences in the past, which explained why he was too sacred to be touched by others.

Especially when he was in weak condition.

It's not that he did not understand what that boy had gone through. If he can, he would not care about him and just left the boy alone in his room. He got more duties and works that been waiting for at his offices; both of his eldest brothers were waiting for him to come back.

But you can't close your heart to the things you don't want to feel.

Due to his empathy ability (1), he accidentally read the boy's feelings, emotions and memories; too much that he almost fainted due to the burden that he accidentally received. Luckily his father was there so that he was able to stop the pressure from taken him fully. His father looked at him with a stare that he understood so well; no need for him to try anymore or he might be fainted.

But for Tatsuya, there was something about the boy that he wanted to know after the sudden touch of him.

He knew that boy was running away from something or someone; nobody would walk in the middle of the night with luggage and bag, plus with injuries that almost all over the place. Nobody would walk in the middle of the road at night and pretended not to hear the sound of honing that was aim to him. He was sure that boy was under deep pressure that he was unable to hear everything at that moment; something that he knew would always falls on the depress people.

He slowly reached out to him, and gently placed his hand on the bandaged arm. As he touched her, he saw something that made him shock and started to hold the boy's hand tightly than before.

Things flashed past Tatsuya faster than he could grasp or make a sense of them. A happy family – a fight between people – watched the lifeless fleshes fell on the floor inside the pool of blood – burning house – abusing from the relatives – deepest despair – taken into an academy– an evil grin from someone in the dark – friends that he met for the first time – Trust – explosion in the building – a funeral – receiving something that broken his heart – a rebellion – almost died – sadness that nobody knows – guilty –

He opened his eyes and looked at the young boy in front of him.

He was never though how much that boy had endured until now.

Watching how his family were killed and their house was burned, and then endless tortured by his relatives before was sold to the academy for the sake of money, that boy's tortures and pains never ceased when someone at the academy used him for many purpose, mostly for the person's evil intentions. But nobody ever realized that, because of his smile and personality, which he believed that boy, had it naturally within himself that people were too dense to realize what exactly happened to the boy.

Goshima's heart was a glass heart.

Once it was broken, it will never be return to its original shape.

And it was the same as human heart.

People rarely paid attention towards others' feelings, never realize how many times they had smashed and crushed these hearts that they were too bad up to the point the hearts were nothing but dusts.

But he could never close his heart tot the things he did not want to know.

Tatsuya had wonder how many times Goshima's heart was smashing into pieces, with people being dense to what had happened. He knew that boy was longing for someone to realize him and he knew, right now, he was the one who must acknowledge him as a person…

Not as a tool.

How much he wanted to stay away from problems but he knew no matter what had happen, he would always know.

Always.

With a sigh, Tatsuya tucked the blanket up to Goshima's neck and left his room. It was then he realized his mother was at his older brother's room door, leaning against it as she looked up at him.

And he knew there was something that had caught his mother attention.

And he knew, he also wanted to know….

* * *

><p><strong>Finally chapter 6 of Hidden Tears is finished! Sorry for the late update, I was busy. Next chapter will be update later than usual, so please read and review.<strong>

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><p><em><strong>Hints or Explanations:<strong>_

(1) – **Empathy** is the capacity to recognize and, to some extent, share feelings (such as sadness or happiness) that are being experienced by another sentient or semi-sentient being. Someone may need to have a certain amount of empathy before they are able to feel compassion. Empathy is also ability with many different definitions. They cover a broad spectrum, ranging from caring for other people and having a desire to help them, to experiencing emotions that match another person's emotions, to knowing what the other person is thinking or feeling, to blurring the line between self and other. Tatsuya possessed this ability but with great amount of power; even without touching any kind of objects or human beings he still can feel the effects of the emotions of memories that left behind. His ability was too strong that even the earrings that he wore to suppress the strength failed several times.


	7. People from the Past

**Hidden Tears.**

A fan fiction by Aoi Kitsukawa

**Disclaimer:** Gakuen Alice is belongs to Higuichi Tachibana-sensei, I only borrow the characters in the manga. Please enjoy reading it!

**Author's Note: **Sorry for the very, very, late update. For the past weeks last month, I had to go for medical check-up with several specialists and the results were not that satisfying. In fact, I felt that my life was shortened into half. Now I'm no longer feeling like my own self; how sad.

This chapter might be a bit different, sorry for the 'unsuitable' ideas; really made this while I'm having writer's block. Please read and review.

**Summary:** He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...

**Tear 7:** People from the Past.

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><p><em><strong>Sometimes I don't know whether I should believe in coincident or not; fate isn't that easy sometimes…<strong>_

* * *

><p>"How's his condition?"<p>

_Uh…Who was that?_

"Well, judging from his condition, I believe he must be in depressing for several years…OPS! Sorry, for several days…"

_Ouch! It hurts…_

"Are you tried to joke with me? You're lucky Izumi isn't here…!"

_Izumi? Isn't that Sakura-san's father?_

_ Do they know each other?_

"Or otherwise she'll kill me. Yeah, I know, I know that Kenji."

_Oh…So it's a woman after all…no wonder why…_

_ Wait!_

_ Where was he?_

_ What is going on here?_

_ What happened to him?_

"So he's just depressing? Then what the heck with his wounds? He must be involved with some fights with those damn delinquents!"

_Wounds?_

"I'm not finish yet! Yes, he's suffering from that (the doctor referred to the fight), but it seems that he had some old wounds that are about to heal. I don't think this boy isn't like those brats; I mean, look at his scars on his neck (1)! It's not normal to have such scars that seem like a choking bear!"

_Scars…?_

"Aoi."

A strong female voice appeared after such small fight. Apparently, it was an elderly woman, judging from the tone that she had used to the fighting people.

The doctor name was Aoi.

Just like Hyuuga Natsume's younger sister's name.

"Kenji and Tatsuya found him four days ago and he got all bruises. I also think like that, but it seems that this boy isn't an ordinary person," She said.

"What do you mean by that Vina? Are you telling me that he's just like us?" Asked Aoi.

"No you idiot! He's not an ordinary person but he also not the same as us."

"So he's an Alice?"

"Indeed."

"How did you know Vina?" Asked the doctor in annoyed voice. Apparently she was angry with Vina for being called as an idiot.

"I found his note book with the academy symbol on it. So I'm not that shock to find out, although I'm curious as much as you people on how he got out form that place."

Arrghh…now they knew him already a run-away student!

"I thought he's just like us…"

He stirred a little as he slowly woke up, but the light seemed stabbing his eyes so he grunted a little. But none of the women realized that he slowly awakens, due to the fact that they stood outside the room where the boy was laying down.

"Aoi, did your husband have taken a case from a man named Goshima Takehiro?"

_Eh?_

"I'm not sure about this…maybe I should ask him about this."

"Better you do it, in fast."

A pause.

"That boy might be his son after all; they share the same surname."

"Are you serious?"

"Does I'm look like to joke around? Preposterous!"

"Mother, the boy's awaken!"

"Really Kenji?"

Sounds of walking footsteps were heard and soon the boy –Goshima Hijiri opened his eyes and saw several people looked at him with concern and worry expression that quite obvious on their faces.

_Where is him now?_

"Are you alright?"

Goshima looked at his right side and saw a man in late 30's; black eyes that looked like black crystal stared at him with concern. His jet black hair fell gently on his right side, making him a beautiful person although with just short hair. Calm and gentle, he almost speechless if he did not realize what was going on with him.

"Where…am I?"

"You're at the Ajuro House young man," Said the elder woman.

She was a woman in late 50s, but her features shown the opposite. Her black hair fell gently on her back, reaching almost her hip. Her black eyes were the same as the man next to him, but more mysterious and dark, as if she had some kind of dark and chilling feeling inside of them.

She was more like a goddess of death!

It was scary…

Really scary.

He had wondered what had happen to him. After he fainted, inside the dark world where everything was nothing but emptiness, had haunted him once again. All the nightmares; regardless during his childhood or the present time, all of them came like a large army that came to attack other enemies territories.

He had tried to protect himself from all those nightmares, but failed.

There was nothing that could protect him in the darkness.

Nothing at all.

Could it be because he was a sinner?

A terrible sinner with terrible crimes; whether he did it conscious or not…

It will never change the fact that he already did such crimes that would never be forgiven by the people who associated with him.

Never.

And he knew he deserved to be forgotten by everyone.

Really…

He…

"Stop thinking such nonsense young man!"

He quickly glanced up and his weary eyes met with cold, dark eyes.

How did she know what he was thinking?

"It's obvious that you're running away from someone, or better I say…"

"Your academy, isn't it?"

Goshima just looked down to his clasped hands. Afraid with such eyes that seemed to dig deeper into his soul, his soul which was stained with dirt and blood; signs of his crime.

"Did we have meet somewhere?" His soft, yet trembling voice seemed to shock the older woman in front of him. Her dark, mysterious eyes went wide before turned soft. She knew what he tried to say; he probably felt some kind of déjà-vu with her.

"Yes, young man." She said. "We did, but it was when you're very young to know about me, as well as your surroundings."

He looked at her, and then the people around them. He could see a woman with long black hair and eyes; covered with glasses, two men; probably siblings since they almost had the same features with each other except their expression. One is cool and the other one was calm and gentle. He looked at them and then turned to the same woman whose now sitting in fornt of him.

"May I know who you are, ma'am?"

She looked at him with unreadable expression, but then she smiled and nodded her head, "My name is Ajuro Shumiko, but people who know me call me with my maiden name –Koizumi Shumiko…"

_Koizumi? She had the same surname as Luna-san…_

"I am your former neighbor…and your guardian."

**End of Chapter 7.**

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><p><strong>The story is ended here; I'm very sorry for the sudden ending. I had some ideas but it was not suitable for this chapter. I had to admit the life as final year students really caught me with it, so I had to struggling against the demands and time, as well as to fight for my own life as well. I already mentioned before that my health was decreased lately, so I'm sorry for the late update. I hope everyone can enjoy this fic.<strong>

**Please read and review. Thank you for your kindness to read this story of mine. –Aoi Kitsukawa.**

* * *

><p><em><strong>Hints or Explanations:<strong>_

(1) Scars on the neck –In Gakuen Alice Chapter 153, Goshima was injured while disguised himself as ESP, and critically wounded on his neck. It was done by Narumi before the plan was backfired and Narumi was shot by Z's Boss.


	8. Can't Talk Can't Smile Don't Blame

**Hidden Tears.**

A fan fiction by Aoi Kitsukawa

**Disclaimer:** Gakuen Alice is belongs to Higuichi Tachibana-sensei, I only borrow the characters in the manga. Please enjoy reading it!

**Author's Note: **Sorry for the very, very, late update. For the past weeks, I was desperately struggling to live without my friends whom always accompanied me, since they already graduated earlier than I did. Not to mention busy with student's life.

This chapter might be a bit different. Please read and review.

**Summary:** He left; he believed nobody would never forgive him, he believe nobody would ever remember him so he left the academy. But little did he know that everyone had been tracing his footsteps ever since he was gone...

* * *

><p><strong>Tear 8:<strong> Can't Talk Can't Smile Don't Blame

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sometimes the pain's too strong to bare...<strong>_

_**And life gets so hard you just don't care. **_

_**You feel so alone you just sit and cry...**_

_**Every second you wish you could die. **_

_**Then you start thinking who would care...**_

_**If one day they woke up-and you weren't there.**_

* * *

><p>He almost could not believe what he had seen with his eyes just now.<p>

Sakurano just rummaging the empty space of Special Star room, to search for evident that Goshima might had left behind. Principal Yukihira said to him, and the rest of the people who knew about the missing president that he felt something was not right, and asked to investigate the empty room, which one was lived by the missing student.

Together with the high school students in Dangerous Ability Class, Sakurano, Subaru and Tono went into the room and the group started the investigation. Shizune, together with Tsubasa and Hayami, went to investigation the background of the missing student. Since all of the people whom got involved with the New Year events that led to the fall of ESP, all of them started to realize; they never knew Goshima more than what they currently knew about him.

Therefore, all of them went apart; searching for the missing parts, which the young lad had left behind, probably not realized it.

At first, they were unable to find any traces that would lead them to know what kind of reason that made the missing person left the academy, and how did he do it. Not until Sakurano poked his head under the king-sized bed, that he found something interesting under it.

He saw two pieces of paper, laid on the floor…

Safely lying under the bed.

After he took them out, he turned over the papers and saw a blur, shaking handwriting; quite different from the ones that he always see –neat, easy to read. This one was a little bit hard to read, and he traced some kind of tear traces on the papers.

Was it belongs to Goshima?

He realized that it was probably written down by the young boy on spontaneity, since he could traces some cross words within the sentences. The paper was dirty and crumbled a little, which made him confirmed that Goshima must had it transferred into somewhere else. Perhaps to his diary or electronic journal.

Getting nods from the others, he started to read the papers. The date that he saw on the right side of the above first page showed that it was write down a few days after the New Year event ended, and he was sure at that time, Goshima was in the hospital due to his injuries.

Was around that time, that young boy started to loose himself?

Curiously, he started to read, only to find out that the consequences were actually too hard for him to handle them…

_Entry 26th._

_I don't know what should I write anymore._

_After the New Year event ended, everything had changed._

_Changed utterly._

_I don't know…what should to do anymore…_

_Although everything was over, deep inside my heart, I knew from the very beginning that my existence isn't fit to anyone…or anyplace._

_Makes me wonder why everyone seems to hate me, even without proper reason?_

_I don't know why…_

_When I recalled my pasts, which was tainted with darkness and pain,_

_So deep, that almost made me drowns in fear and sadness,_

_Without anything warms around me._

_Without protection._

_Day by day as I passed through the corridor the school building, I knew better than any of them._

_That I have no place to exist._

'_He's the ESP's spy?'_

'_You've got to be kidding me! That gross!'_

'_I wonder that's how he got the role as the president?'_

'_What a monster!'_

_**A monster…**_

_I wonder….how long I have not heard that kind of words._

_Ever since the death of my parents, whom I witnessed in agony as red flames consuming their death bodies and our old house, I've never been treated with kindness and gentleness._

_Most of the experiences that I had were nothing but this;_

"_You're not a human, you're monster! Having a disgusting Alice as yours is nothing but a freak! A curse! Stay away from my family!"_

_**Am I really that freak?**_

Sakurano almost not believed what he had read just now. Was this something that he can expect from a person such as Goshima?

Why he never told him about this?

"_Monster likes you only deserve to be used as a slave!"_

_**Am I really that low?**_

"_If we send him there, the academy will give us lots of money!"_

_**Am I really like a thing that can be sold?**_

"_If only we got the fortune from him…"_

_**Am I really unworthy to be a human?**_

"_Why do we have to take care of this burden garbage?"_

_**Am I really that dirty?**_

_I don't understand…_

Sakurano's hands were shaking.

_**Why does everyone look at me with disgusting expression?**_

He almost tried to tear up the papers, if not because of Subaru held his hands.

Or otherwise it will turn into pieces.

_Am I just a mere tool only to be used and then tossed into garbage after being used for such a long time?_

_**Sometimes the pain's too strong to bare...**_

_**And life gets so hard that I just don't care.**_

_**Whenever I feel so alone I just sit and cry...**_

_**Because nobody was there for me.**_

_**Every second, I wish that I could die.**_

_**Then I would start thinking; who's among them would care...**_

_**If one day they woke up-and I weren't there.**_

Because the emotions that he felt were to strong to him.

_My heart had shattered._

_I don't want to stay here anymore._

_Nobody wants to hear what I want to say, even just a little bit…_

_Is it so hard to lend any ears to me?_

_What did I do wrong?_

Indeed. What was exactly Goshima did that caused him to think that way? Was there something that he didn't tell them before?

_I know that I'm a sinful person, but even from the moment I've been in the academy…_

_Nobody wants to be with me._

'That's not true Goshima!' He snapped. 'Why are you thinking like that?'

_I couldn't say or smile truly because of it._

'Then why didn't you tell us your problems?'

_Am I'm not allowed to be happy even just a bit?_

Nobody said that to you, right!

_I am tired…so tired of all these…_

_I just want to disappear…_

Sakurano's eyes snapped the moment he read the last lines of the entry. The next thing he knew, he was already half lying on the floor, with Subaru held him closed to him, the students and two principals who were looking at him…

And tears on his eyes.

Kazumi –the High School Principal looked at him with sad eyes. When Sakurano finished his reading, he suddenly fell back as him and Shiki were about to enter the room. For a while it was a bit chaotic, since Sakurano suddenly fainted. Until he took the papers from Sakurani's grip and read it, that he understood what had happened.

Sakurano accidentally felt the sad emotions form the papers, which once were belonged to Goshima Hijiri.

No wonder why he felt that young boy's smile was…abnormal.

However, he couldn't blame him.

He was unable to smile, unable to talk the things he had hid until it was reaching its limits.

So the can't blame him.

Why?

"_Because like knowledge, certain secrets must be hidden on certain levels."_

The words from the girl he had once in love with, was suddenly appeared on his mind.

Yes, that must be the reason why Goshima didn't bother to tell them.

In order to protect himself from being hurt, he created a 'shell' of himself.

Then it was crushed, shattered.

Leaving that boy emotionally destroyed.

Because of these, he couldn't really blame him for everything.

Because parts of the mistakes…

Were also from him…

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><p><strong>End of Chapter 8.<strong>

**The story is ended here; I'm very sorry for the sudden ending. I had some ideas but right now, my emotions are in turmoil now. I had to admit the life as final year student really caught me with it, so I had to struggling against the demands and time, as well as to fight for my own life as well. I had passed my re-sit exam paper only to make myself miserable in the next paper. Sometimes I really can't take the situations anymore; sometimes I just wish if I have the courage to kill myself, since I almost had nobody here to listen to me. I had to struggle all alone while others just kept my problem worse day by day!**

**What did I do wrong…?**

**I'm sorry for the late update. Even so, I hope everyone can enjoy this fic. Please read and review. Thank you for your kindness to read this story of mine. –Aoi Kitsukawa.**


	9. Important Announcement

**Important Announcement**

By Aoi Kitsukawa

Date: 18.3.2013

Greetings everyone.

It's been a long time since my last update in . I'm truly sorry for those who put me on their alerts and yet I did not make any update since my last time doing it. I am so sorry for unable to update the stories.

The reason for this announcement is that for temporary, I won't be able to update all of my stories –either the long time hiatus or the current one, I am so sorry for doing this. I am very sorry…

Yesterday on 17.3.2013, I received shocking news from my friend that one of my dearest lecturers passed away in the morning. At first, my friend was asking me what am I doing that time, and then he (it's a male friend) asked me to sit down and calm down. When I asked him what was going on, he told me the news. Immediately I became panic when I read the message and quickly opened my FB to check for others as well. I keep on reading the update, and it was confirmed that he already passed away, in peace; leaving us forever. It was really hurt, and it made me realize that he never is able to meet us again, and vice versa.

On March 17, 2013, the professor lost his short battle with his heart. He was admitted to the Gleneagles Hospital Kuala Lumpur on Monday 11.3.2013 due to heart attack at 4.00 a.m at his house until his final day. On the day he was admitted, he undergone three bypass surgeries in order to save his life. On Tuesday he was able to wake up and talked, mentioning his eagerness to be healthy and coming to classes. However on 4.00 am he once again got another heart attack and since then, his condition was very critical that he need a life support for himself. In the end, he lost his battle and passed away with families surrounding him…

All I could do was break down...

And cried.

He was an Iraqian lecturer whom teaching at my university for almost 16 years. He was one of the kindest and nicest lecturers in the History and Civilization department (my main major) that we the students ever have. He was my first teacher, the first history lecturer I met and yet he still remembered me although I didn't take his classes. I can't imagine one day I would lose someone that I know and more importantly, he was a person that I always encounter every day and attended his classes. A person whom was, irreplaceable by anyone, he was the only person in the course whose expert in archeology. A kind and gentle person always started his classes with salam and short speech, with smile always attached to his lips, his loud but gently voice echoed in my mind, like it'll never be gone.

I can't deny myself for feeling sad of his death. It was so depressing, and I cried a lot yesterday before, during and after funeral. It made me tired and headache, almost sick, but the pain won't go away just like that. I became emotional, really. I'm kind of sensitive with talks about losing someone that I know, especially if they're like a family to me. It's really painful to me, as I kept reading the posts of my friends in the FB's wall. When I found out how my juniors planned to visit him at the hospital with fruits as the souvenir, hoping that he had a speedy recovery, it hurts so much that we cried, hugging each other.

As a result, I have to take some times to comfort myself, means that I have to leave the site temporarily since me and the other students and friends are still mourning for the loss. I just cannot go on writing the stories with many reminders of my late lecturer, one that I will never have the blessing of seeing ever again. Even in today's status, my junior said:

"_A gloomy Monday with lots of sadness and grief in Department of History and Civilization…with the lecturers whose face were change…the students with tears in the eyes…life must goes on. Prayers need to be given…_

_May the prof will continue to smile towards the Creator…"_

I apologize from the bottom of my heart. It is such a selfish act, and I am so ashamed of my weakness. But I cannot start any of my works, for I will miss him all the more. May he rest in peace, so that we the people whom he left will be able to go on...

_**-Aoi Kitsukawa-**_


End file.
